Morning of surgery

We got the kids off to school and I showered and got dressed in my Beastie Boys shirt.

So far this morning I’m hungry. I’m about an hour away from hangry.
I’m at the hospital and already received the injection of radioactive tracer in my right breast. It burned but was not nearly as bad as I expected. Not really bad at all. M and I are waiting in a private pre surgical room. There is a tv remote but no tv. I’m just waiting here in these awesome yellow socks.

Another person came and took about six tubes of blood, then the nurse came in and asked a million questions and started an IV.

I had a meeting with the anesthesiologist and he is going to give me a block before surgery, then put me under. Afterward I’ll have a boatload of other pain and anti nausea meds. I liked him and he is going to use my insulin pump and CGMS to manage my blood sugar during surgery.

Letter to my boobs

Dear Righty,

It is you, not me. We need to break up. You have done good work over the years. You attracted young men, possibly some women, and helped me secure the best of the best men for a husband. You fed two healthy children as I nursed them and pumped milk out in deplorable conditions at work for literally years. Your help may have saved my son’s life by building his immune system when he was born with an infection. But you have betrayed me and I need to cut you out of my life. I won’t cry over you, or listen to Alanis Morisette breakup music. I’ll treat you like an old boyfriend who cheated and remember the good times, but think of you rarely and move on with my life. You don’t deserve my time.

Dear Lefty,

I know you haven’t done anything wrong but I just can’t trust you any more. Your relationship with Righty is so close and without her you will turn bitter and ugly and I will worry, always worry that you will betray me, too. It’s possible you have already. I really don’t have anything more to say to you, but I’m sorry.

With bittersweet regards,

Beth

Monogrammed Boobs

I saw the doctor today and he monogrammed me!

“You’ll feel like you are peeing yourself, but you aren’t.”

Last Thursday I was scheduled for a PET scan. Oncologist #2 wants to use it for initial staging of the cancer. When I arrived at the imaging center they informed me it had been cancelled due to insurance not responding yet with precertification. They require a CT scan and a bone scan before they will approve a PET.

So we scheduled both for Tuesday. When they confirmed, I discovered I was only scheduled for a bone scan and they fixed it. Then they cancelled. Then rescheduled. Then cancelled. Then rescheduled. Then cancelled and due to an inch of ice causing snowmageddon 2015 the offices were closed on Monday and I couldn’t do anything to fix it.

This morning I called the oncologist and said, “What do we need to do to get this fixed today. I’m having surgery on Friday.” C, the oncologist’s scheduler told me she had a precertification on the fax that morning. She put me on hold and got me back in for both scans today, luckily I hadn’t had breakfast yet.

I arrived at the imaging center and there was so much ice in the parking lot I could barely get into the building. After getting checked in and partially undressed the CT tech started an IV and the nuclear medicine tech injected me with technetium, a radioactive tracer for the bone scan. The CT tech used to work with Oncologist #2 and I asked him for all the dirt on the doctor ;). He got a great review.

Then came the best part of the whole experience.

CT tech: “Um, I’m going to be totally honest with you about what’s going on. They just called me and said they don’t have a precertification and we need to stop the test. I’m not sure how you got checked in without it. It shouldn’t happen. You already got an IV and injection and I’m personally going to make sure you aren’t charged for anything. I’m so sorry.”

Me: “C had a precertification and sent it this morning when she scheduled. I also heard them call for it when I checked in. I’m just going to get my book out and read while you fix this.”

Less than 5 minutes pass and the CT tech returns.

CT tech: “I know C and she doesn’t make mistakes. If she said you were precert’d it’s good enough for me, I’m going to scan you.”

Then it gets even better. He did half of the scan and then said, “OK, you are doing great. I’m going to inject saline and then the contrast solution. You will get hot, and it will feel like you are peeing yourself, but you aren’t. I just don’t want you to be surprised.”

He wasn’t kidding.

He finished the CT and they told me to return in 2 hours for the bone scan.

Like any diabetic who must fast until noon I pounded Starbucks and Chick-fil-a, then went to work. Like any good project manager I called C to confirm she had sent the precert. She sent it 3 times to 3 different people.

I returned two hours later for the bone scan which was uneventful with the exception of looking over and thinking the tech was asleep until he opened his eyes and suddenly started brushing his beard. With a brush. That he keeps on the PC.

Along with an ice storm, is it a full moon?

Wigging Out

I was scheduled to have a PET scan today, but when I arrived they told me it was cancelled because my insurance won’t approve it until after I have a CT scan and a bone scan. So I’m rescheduled for the CT and bone scans next week.

At lunch I decided I wanted to go look at wigs and took a friend from work with me. Most of them were hilarious but a couple looked like me. What do you think?

Pink Ribbons

Today I went to “Pink Ribbons: A Mastectomy and Lymphadema Boutique.” It’s coincidentally located across the street from a strip club. This gave me a good laugh.

I got fitted and ordered the ugly camis that hold the surgical drains. It was weird trying on a shirt and imagining how it will fit after surgery. The mastectomy garment designers aren’t very adventurous. You can choose white, and one offered cream or black. Where is the leopard print?

But seriously, the ladies at Pink Ribbons are amazing. They also measured me for a lymphadema sleeve to wear every time I fly. I hope it’s not too uncomfortable, it’s a long trip to China or Russia!

Pre-admission Testing

The appointment began with a hilarious, crotchety old guy in the waiting room. He was an ex-professional baseball player waiting for a hip replacement and telling stories about his glory days.

I had to answer about a hundred questions about every possible medical issue you can imagine, even though I did this online during my pre-registration.

The anesthesia nurse talked to me about the anesthesia and side effects but most of the discussion revolved around my diabetes management during surgery. In 15 years I’ve never let anybody else manage it. It was good to hear that I can wear my pump during surgery and they actually want my blood sugar to be high, about 250 to prevent hypoglycemia during surgery. During the 15 hours of fasting before surgery I was worried about getting too low and after discussing it she called the doctor to confirm I can use glucose gel if needed during fasting. I’ve also asked for my IV to be started at check-in so I can get some dextrose.

Then another nurse checked my vitals and did an EKG. And 4 tubes of blood and a cup of pee later I was finished. For the first time in a month nobody felt me up!

Next is a PET scan on Thursday.

Oncologist #2

I met with another medical oncologist, Dr W.

Felt me up? Check.
Took blood? Check.
Supported bilateral mastectomy? Check

Dr W was very reassuring and said not to worry, I’ll be fine. He also thinks it’s early stage, no radiation needed but he would like me to do chemo because of my young age. Probably 8 rounds.

He also said he recommends using a combination of two different pills instead of tamoxifen. He also scheduled a PET scan for me so we can confirm if cancer cells are confined to my right breast.

I saw a chemo room and it was exactly what you would expect. A bunch of recliners in a room with IV stands next to them. I’ll be the loud patient, bringing friends and family and talking.

Now I’m trying to decide if I want to see a third oncologist.

Before the appointment FedEx delivered a surprise gift from my sister-in-law, two pretty bracelets with inspirational charms. It was nice to wear them to the appointment. After work I came home to find a wonderful care package from my brother and his fiancé. New PJs, luxury bath items, tea, a book (Unbroken, which I’ve wanted to read), spa gift certificate :), and all the supplies I’ll need during surgical recovery. Coincidentally my soon-to-be SIL is a nurse at a major cancer center and her help and advice has been invaluable.

Next week I have hospital pre-admission testing and a PET scan.

Two weeks til surgery!

Oncologist #1

Everybody wants to feel me up and take some blood.

Today I met with Dr J, a medical oncologist. He seems to believe that it’s likely I’ll have Stage 1, but we need the surgical pathology and lymph node biopsy complete to confirm.

There is still a chance that I’ll need some chemo, but I’ll worry about that later. Radiation is unlikely.

Dr J reaffirmed that the bilateral mastectomy is a good choice for me and answered some questions I had about diabetes and cancer.

We also met his social worker who focuses on patient centered needs. She was great and basically offered me the advice to “chill out” and take things as they come. She also gave me a book on helping children cope when a parent has cancer. Should be an interesting read.